Restoration, part two.

  As I sit here in the comfort of my warm bed with clean sheets after a long warm shower and I try to sum up the experiences these past two months have held for me, I’m finding myself at a loss for words. The past several days have been an emotional rollercoaster for me, but as I dig for answers behind the tears and pain and sadness I have been feeling, at the end of the day the only words that are able to form from my mouth are “I miss my friends.” I miss my Zambian life, and the things that once were comforts of home before leaving, now seem worthless and pail in comparison to the joy I found during my time in Zambia. The country and the people I met have touched me in a way that I will never forget. This experience is now a part of what shapes me into who I am and my time there has been a defining season in my life. I learned so many lessons and grew deeper in my faith, and I know these things will only continue to unfold as I process and sift through all of my emotions in these next several weeks. I experienced God in a way that I hope will change me for the better to be an example that will show others more of who Jesus is just as I saw in others this summer. My eyes were opened to and my heart broken for poverty, sadness, orphans, widows, and the profound effect of AIDS on the community in Zambia. Yet, despite my heart being broken to the core for the people and this country, somewhere along the way it was stitched back together by the relationships I formed over there, and maybe even made more whole than it was before leaving or even than I thought possible. I opened my heart to the people in this community. I so quickly fell in love with the kids and the mama’s I spent my time over there with. They showed me a deeper kind of love than I thought was possible, all while pointing me time and time again to be more like Jesus, and by simply doing life with them for this small moment in time my life has been forever changed. I opened my heart and I fell in love, and now as I sit here, half a world away from this life I grew accustomed to and these people I fell in love with, my heart is in pain. 

I am struggling to unravel what is next after such an incredible experience, but in that trusting in the only thing I can –the goodness of God. I am brought back to my very first blog post I wrote prior to embarking on this beautiful journey of restoration. Just as I saw my prayers that the Lord would restore and bring new life to these orphans and widows be answered in my time over there, I am comforted in the truth that He too is restoring and refining me through this process. That while my heart feels as though it has been broken into a million different pieces since leaving, He is using it to His glory and will continue to renew my soul and give me strength and joy in knowing and believing that He truly is restoring me daily. I do not know what the Lord has in store next, or where He will lead me after experiencing such things this summer, but I am following His lead with open hands, trusting that He is good and is by my side through this entire process. As I try to continue unpacking and discerning where He is leading me next, I am confident that whatever this next season looks like, it will be rich and sweet with Him by my side. I am extremely thankful that He would allow me to take part in such beautiful things this summer, and thankful for all of the love, prayers, encouragement, and support from all of you through the process. So, thank you, thank you, thank you! I would not have had the opportunity to experience such things if it weren’t for you all, my biggest supporters and encouragers. I hope to continue updating you on what the Lord is teaching me in these next weeks and months, as well as where He is leading next. Thank you again for all you have done for me and I am excited to continue sharing in this journey with you all.

Molly's House

   This past week, we were given the sweet opportunity to serve alongside the short term teams of construction crew and camp hope counselors. Through spending some time with this team both on site of camp in Chongwe as well as time outside of that eating a few meals together, I was able to learn a little bit about some of the members on this team and their background with Every Orphan’s Hope. One of the men I got to spend some sweet time with in conversation over dinner one night is named John. John’s family has been invested in the ministry since nearly the beginning, and thus has a huge heart for these kids and the work that is being done over here. About a year and a half ago, John’s wife Molly was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. She fought a tough battle for about four months before the Lord called her home to be with Him last June. After she passed away, John and his family decided to give the money from Molly’s life insurance toward building House 7 in Chongwe Village of Hope. The money donated from Molly’s family was enough to fund the entirety of house 7. Talk about the Lord working all things together for His good. Nearly a year later, this June, House 7 was completed with a Mama and 8 kids moving in to their new home. What a sweet thing to see and be a part of, John seeing not only all the walls of this house up, but 8 new children running around the village of hope, now knowing what it means to have new life, not just in these homes, but first in Christ. After spending the week serving on the construction team for building House 8, John was able to spend some sweet time learning about and getting to know the children living in Molly’s house. What a sweet and special time that was not only for John, but for everyone who got to watch those interactions as well. I never met Molly, nor do I know much about her, but from what I have been told about her, she would have loved seeing these sweet faces running around, and she would have fallen in love with all of them the moment she met them. Her life is continuing to bless people and glorify the Lord, bringing more to Christ and we can do nothing but praise God for that. 

 

A Giving Heart

     The other day as we were in Lusaka for a quick overnight trip to restock on groceries and spend some time updating our blogs, the other interns and I were discussing how grateful we were for the Mamas in Chongwe and how wonderful they have been to us during our time there, truly taking us in as one of their children in every aspect. While discussing this, we decided we wanted to do something special for them to show them how thankful we were for all they have done for not only their own children, but for us, their additional children for the past several weeks. After contemplating a few different options, we decided we would make cupcakes for each of the Mamas, since they seemed to be such a hit at our Lusaka girl’s party a few weeks ago. We dedicated the morning to making the cupcakes in the office and then were on our way back to Chongwe to deliver these special treats and continue in our Camp Hope duties. When we arrived in Chongwe, we went house by house delivering the cupcakes to each of the Mamas. They were all unsurprisingly extremely grateful for their special treats and thanked us immensely for the cupcake treat they so rarely, if ever receive. I am constantly amazed at what simple things bring such joy and thanksgiving to the people here, bringing to life the command in the bible to be thankful in all circumstances.

     Later that night, as the kids in House 1 were finishing up dinner and doing some last minute studying before bed, Mama Anna called each of them over to her one by one. At first I was confused as to why she would be calling them over thinking maybe they had gotten in trouble for something until Andrew returned to continue our review session with a cupcake in his hand. Mama Anna had given each of her children some of her cupcakes before eating any of them for herself. She made sure each of her children enjoyed the special treat we had made for her before indulging herself. Not because she had to by any means. Not because she felt guilty. Simply because she wanted to. This woman has the biggest heart in the world and always puts others before herself, in literally every circumstance. She cares so deeply for her children, and that is so evident even in this small example of sharing her cupcakes. She could have so easily enjoyed all six cupcakes for herself without her children even knowing. In fact, that is what we fully intended for the Mamas to do when making them these treats. I am constantly challenged to be more like Christ because of the way Mama Anna lives her life so dedicated to serving the Lord, and I hope to one day be as good of a Mother as she is to these eight precious children she is so selflessly raising as her own. 

Camp Hope #2 Update

In other news, Camp Hope #2 got off to a slower start, but is in full swing now. Unfortunately several busloads of kids were unable to come to camp due to the headmaster of their school not allowing them to miss school this week, despite the earlier agreement set up. So, this week of camp is much smaller than last, but nonetheless we are still just as excited as ever, and so are the kids that are here for camp! While it was another one of those adapting to the Zambian culture moments, the short term team adapted and adjusted quickly, serving in different capacities outside their comfort zones (some even joining the construction team temporarily) until things got sorted out. There is so much excitement and enthusiasm about camp, and the Lord is already beginning a mighty work once again through these orphans and vulnerable children’s lives. In just the first day of camp, there were already several young girls in one group to hear the Gospel and respond with an acceptance of Christ as their Savior. Praise the Lord. We are excited for what the rest of the week has in store, and are expectant that the Lord will again make His presence known in the lives of these kids.

Not ready for goodbye

I cannot believe that a week from today I will be boarding my flight home to America. My time here has been so sweet and cherished, and I am sad to be saying goodbye to it all in just one short week. I am going to miss so many things about this place that has become my home away from home. I am going to miss my new family and all the hugs and love I constantly receive from the sweetest kids in the world. I am going to miss waking up to the sound of voices praising the Lord right outside the bedroom door for morning devotions at 5:00 am every morning. I am going to miss late night talks around the fire with the older boys in Chongwe before snuggling into bed and having pillow talk while falling asleep with the girls. I am going to miss running around in the dirt with kids hanging on my arms and legs. I am going to miss the way Mama Anna gives me the biggest hug in the world and says “My Daughter” each time she sees me throughout the day. To put it simply, I am going to miss my life out here. As the time has drawn nearer for me to leave this place and all of these people I have fallen so deeply in love with, my heart can’t help but ache at the thought. I am not ready to go. I don’t think I will ever be fully ready to go. My heart longs for more time with these kids each moment I spend with them, and the thought of leaving them behind in a week brings my heart so much pain. In working through these emotions, however, I have been reminded of where the Lord has called me. While I would stay here above returning to the States in a heartbeat, the Lord has called me home for a new season. A new and final semester of school with new and exciting adventures and challenges that lay ahead. I am unsure of what these next few months will hold for me, and sometimes even question why the Lord would expose my heart and allow me to fall so in love with a place only to be stripped away for the next season of my life. But I am again reminded, His ways are not mine. This life is not my own. And I will choose to follow wherever the Lord leads me, in whatever season that may be. My heart longs to one day soon be back here, playing in the dirt again with these kids, but I cannot be sure of anything at this point. While I would love to promise both myself and these kids that I will be back one day soon, that would not be fair. I must choose to follow the Lord’s call on my life and right now that is to return home. I am choosing to enjoy this last week to the fullest, hopeful to return one day soon, but opening my hands to the Lord and His call on the rest of my life. 

Back to the Bush

After some much needed rest for the weekend back in Lusaka, although we remained quite busy with the short term mission team on the ground, we are excited and ready to head back to the Bush for the next week of Camp Hope, as well as have more special sleepovers and quality time with all the MFH kids. As I shared in my earlier blog post, Week One of Camp was filled with such richness and the Lord made His presence known for the first time to so many of these sweet and precious children. The total number of orphans that showed up to Camp last week and heard the Good News of Jesus was 370. Of that number, 270 kids accepted Christ as their personal Savior for the first time. Praise God and to Him be all the glory. I am in total awe of the mighty work He has done and continues to do in this country, and before our very eyes in this place. We are going into this next week with open hands and empty hearts, expectant for them to be filled with the love and greatness of our God all over again. I will hopefully be in touch midweek for an update on the week, so stay tuned for that. For now, pray for hearts to be moved and lives to be changed all over this place this week.